Were It Not That I Was Lost
by Hello Kit
Summary: This is a little fanfic story containing the past of one of my favorite Seiryuu Seishi, Tomo.
1. The Sun Goes Down

Authors Note: This is my little fanfic story containing the past of one of my favorite Seiryuu Seishi, Tomo __

Authors Note: This is my little fanfic story containing the past of one of my favorite Seiryuu Seishi, Tomo. Yeah, I've made up some of my own characters for a thicker plot, but its my fanfic and I'm the author, so I can do that. You'll notice that some of what the characters say/think are lyrics from random songs that I'd listened to while writing this, and that's just part of my style. Well, I'd love to hear some reviews and thoughts about it though no matter what, I'll keep adding on, so enjoy.

"Beautiful," Zane's voice spoke to Chuin, but it was bemused staring out at Erato as she sat alone on a bench constructing a ball made from folded paper pieces. The two of them stood on a bridge over a small stream that ran through the little town of Karauchi. Trees with pink and white blooming flowers painted the warm scene. Not far from them were the other students of Master Urine's (hehe) martial art teachings, in recess. "I wonder what it would be like to run my fingers through her long hair. Do you ever think like that, Chuin? Just what it would be like to feel someone?"

Chuin was struck out of his own daydream when Zane turned to him for an answered. "No, not often." Chuin feared his cheeks would blush when his eyes fell not wishing to meet Zane's green gems. He was no good at lying, but equally as bad when confessing the truth. There wasn't even an option of telling his best friend his true feelings. _Zane, you're the beautiful one. _ Now his eyes looked farther away from his friend. He was ashamed of something he could not change. It always left him crying at night. That alone threw him farther and farther away from being a man. Men didn't cry; men didn't feel their emotions. 

"If you could wish for one thing, what would it be?" Zane seemed to have a sixth sense for the moments to ask the wrong questions. Chuin didn't have to worry as to how to answer, for Zane thrusted his hand to the sky, "See that star?"

"No," though Chuin still looked to where Zane pointed. He held his hand to his forehead to shield his eyes from the bright sun that made the stars unable to see during the day. 

"Well its there." Zane told him. "Its always there, every night. I wish upon it that love, happiness, and luck will come my way." 

"Does it work?" wondering aloud the words asked. 

"It will." Zane was confident. "I just have to wait for it."

"Boys!" the two sixteen-year-olds turned to the call that would still address them even at age thirty. Masters never wait long for students, so they had to hustle. Zane bowed his head and quickly recited a short prayer to the unseen star before darting after Chuin.

Bowing to address their honorable teacher, Master Urine. Five other students meditated on large mats that were set up in the square courtyard. Their training had started when they learned to walk and now they were reaching a very matured and advanced level. Chuin remembered when he was a very small child and watching the older boys in admiration of their skills. It was now that he looked down at the little children with their big round eyes as he defeated any one who challenged him. Strangely enough, as hard as he tried, he never felt he fit in that portion of society. It was where the men fought for the women's favor and heart; neither of which he desired.

Long time ago, a group of traveling performers came in a wagon with bright colors not just woven in their clothes, but also painted on their faces. The men were magnificent and enchanting. Dressed in such a fashion that they were never who they seemed to be; true identities hidden behind a false face. Chuin looked into every book he could find on their performance, which was called opera. On a star that night, he would wish to be like them. Travel as they did becoming someone he might truly be.

That day during training Chuin sense a change in the atmosphere. It was not as if could do this on any occasion, but right then he felt a little...suffocated. The suffocation brought him to notice a male, his age, that stood out from the others; wearing clothes that didn't place him as a student.. Standing aside, the light blue hair hid his pale eyes that looked Chuin over. He felt the gaze of this boy's eyes, but it was when they locked eyes, there was something touched in Chuin that he'd never felt before. Arousing, eh, only a bit, but it was as if he was feeling with a nerve he'd never known was there. 

Having been so distracted within, it amazed Zane that Chuin's reactions were so sharp. Chuin grabbed his friend's turned opponent right foot, which was aimed for the left side of his face. Chuin was a great fighter and beat his friend in the short battle. That boy, he had watched the fight, but now his presence was gone. The presence that had been just...warm, it was gone. Yet it left a small mark within Chuin's heart that he couldn't quite pick the right nerve to feel with. 

The surroundings were disturbed now and he couldn't relax with his muscles so tense. Every thing his senses felt was magnified. He couldn't handle it; not there. Leaving the mat would be later punishable, and his excuse was a little unstable, but Chuin needed to be alone. He needed to cry and like most times he didn't know why.

***

Finding closure in an empty kitchen of the small school, he had put his head in his hands and drowned in misery. His mind, never completely sure of where he was and he couldn't understand any of his feelings. He wasn't even able to deprive himself of even just one. He felt everything. 

Returning home as the sun began its gradual descend, he found his father not at home. The man he called his 'father' claimed that Chuin had been abandoned as a young child, that he had no idea where the tattooed symbol on Chuin's right hip had come from or even what it meant. This all made Chuin feel even more lost. All he knew was that it told him he was different.

In his small room, Chuin discovered his window was opened. Closing it, he found on his mat below it, a small colored paper ball. Picking it up, he saw that one flap was left open. Inside the ball was a paper rose.

***

Chuin's father made herbal tea for every meal. He meditated all day, was a peaceful man, but gambling was an addiction. Throwing away things he didn't even own. Chuin thanked the gods that he still was able to live under a roof. It may have seemed as if he was a normal father, but fathers didn't do the things he did to his 'son'. From the very beginning, even when Chuin was too young to truly understand that he had been abandoned, he felt that this man couldn't truly be his father when he'd undress the both of them. The pain he had felt... Oh, but for a reason Chuin still did not understand, they continued on living together and acting during the day as if nothing happened at night. From the care in the man's daily actions, Chuin couldn't hate him and that was almost as painful as the physical damage. 

At dinner, the sun made the sky purple and music began to play off in the distance. "Do you plan on going to the star festival?" Chuin's father asked. Before he could lie and say that Zane and himself hadn't planned on it, for he wanted to get rest for the next day, there was a knock on the door.

"Ready for the festival?" Zane welcomed himself in. 

***

Food, games, music, and dancing flooded the center of the town. Children ran with sparklers and purple lamps on sticks laughing as Chuin knew he once had. Too old for the games and foolish magic tricks, he followed Zane who was drawn to the dancing throng of bodies. Mainly teens, some which they knew, made the air warm so that they sweated together.

Waiting for an entrance, Zane kept Chuin to the side of it all to just view the scene. They leaned against the wall of a building next to the stage for the musicians. As if he had any, none of the boys lived up to Chuin's standards, so he didn't study their dancing. 

"Why did we come here?" Chuin wore a black tied Chinese piece with the piece in front and the slit with black baggy pants. 

Zane could hear him, but he acted as if he didn't. His eyes scanned the area for hot girls, but would only lock on one. He grabbed Chuin's arm, when he saw her, "Over there!" Chuin was busy getting over the sensation of being grabbed like that as Zane went on, "Do you see that glow? She must be an angel underneath."

"You only believe you're in love," Chuin said to himself, for although he spoke aloud, Zane wasn't listening. "Making no real sense when you talk, nothing will come of all this."

"Look at her eyes." Zane urged his friend. "They're calling-" he seemed cut off by a sudden discovery for he read the new situation. Turning to his friend, his eyes were almost glaring, but inside they were in disbelief. "You."

As if she had heard, Erato made her way directly to the two of them. A crowd of boys made way for her, watching as she picked the chosen one. Standing a foot away from Chuin's feet, she didn't even feel Zane breathing on her left. "If you want to feel the heat," she tempted with the song's melody in her voice. "Just come along and play with me." Chuin dropped his eyes, she couldn't be speaking to him. _No, don't talk to me,_ he begged_ Please, just leave me alone._

"Be my boy," she had to reach for his right hand that was hidden separating his butt from the wall he seemed to be clinging to. She dragged him behind her bouncing her hips side to side with the beat of the speedy music, "I want to be your lover girl." turning to face him, she took his other hand and began to walk backwards, "Be my lover boy." 

She pulled him into the mist of the suffocating crowd and began to hop around feeling the sound of the music. Chuin just seemed to move as others knocked him in rhythm bringing him into the sway. His vision would begin to blur, but it stopped noticing a head of blue locks in a mob of dancers. That boy, Chuin knew it was him, for the awkward warmth had returned. With those eyes that even now continued to stare at Chuin putting him into a trance so that he didn't even notice the girls surrounding him, nor the dirty words Erato would begin to speak to him, "I want to feel your body," she said it as if she could have been calling up to the gods. "Tonight I'm ready, honey.

"This time of night always makes me lose control," as if she needed an excuse for her actions. "I'm just a girl that's looking for some fun." she seemed innocent in her eyes, those that had been 'calling' yet her dance that was so close, held another story and it was one he did not care to read.

Away from her, that was all he wanted. He was now finding it harder and harder to breathe and couldn't stop for air for there was none to inhale. Trapped in the smothering bodies a new hand grabbed his wrist. Ice cold, was it even skin?

Gasping for air in the moment he found himself outside of the mob, his absence unnoticed. Alone. He always ended up alone. Yet this way he easily fled the scene. 

***

Wiping away his fresh tears, he tried to gather himself. _Be a man,_ he told himself. _Be a man. _ The words escaped his thoughts to a low whisper he spoke only to himself, he said "Be a man. Damn it, Chuin, be a-"

"Chuin?" the soft voice didn't mean to startle him, but Chuin began to frantically dry his eyes hiding them away from whomever approached him sitting there under the roof on the 'porch' of a building. "Are you all right?"

It was Erato. She had never spoken to him before, other than moments before while dancing. How she knew his name, he didn't know. Approaching as if one wrong step would scare him off, she slowly came to a stop her eyes staring through the long hairs that had escaped the two buns on the back of her head.

"Yes," he arched his back a little pouting out his chest like a little boy acting tough.

"I was worried seeing you run like that."

"I'm not much of a dancer."

"You seemed to do fine," her smiled indicated that the mood of the conversation was no longer morose. "I love the way you look at me." she spoke, chin low with her eyes focused on his pretty face. Her feet brought her only a single step closer. "Don't think I don't see you watching me with your friend."

"All the boys look at you." Chuin didn't want to talk to her about this, and was left mainly speechless so all that he said came out in little choppy bits. He tried to look out at the purple glow of the festival, being the only light in the town other than the stars above. 

It was then that a cool breeze blew his long dark hair back over his shoulders and with the moon light shining down on his pale face, she stepped closer to unburden her conscience, "I don't know what it is, but everything about you is just so irresistible."

__

You lock me up in your dirty cage while I feel pain inside. He never looked towards her when she spoke. She felt the urge to get upon the ledge and she grabbed the pole next to him."Hey Pretty," she held onto the pole as she spun around him. "Hey now, can't you feel me longing?" she asked hoping down right in front of him. "Hey now - can't you feel _me_?" she took his hand, but lost it. There was pain in his face that had eyes shut so tight as to not view her in this state in which he knew in his heart she truly was not. She put on this whore act to appeal to him. It was because of _him_ that she was pretending to be someone she wasn't. She was so lucky to know who she was, but didn't know its value for she was abusing her identity for his attention.

"I'm sorry," he opened his eyes, but they were kept low as was his voice speaking slowly now. "I'm just not attracted to you." he quickly added, "You are very beautiful." he sighed. "I am just...not attracted. I'm sorry."

She paused, in breath and in thought to comprehend what he was saying. Falling on the bench next to him her eyes searched her mind for clarification. Blinking she understood and saw the real picture. A tear paced itself down her cheek. He wasn't aware until she sniffled to suck in a second one.

"I felt it," her hands were holding each other at her chest. Now she was the one looking down. "You were it. The one." she paused. "I would have never done _this_ for anyone else." she couldn't keep back, "Don't you find me the _least_ bit attractive."

"I said I do!" he convinced her. "But don't do _this_ for anyone. You know who you are. You need to just feel what you are," he felt he had to tell her, "What you are is beautiful."

"So you do find me attractive?" her face lit up a bit.  
"_Yes_!" 

"Oh, but I love you!" she flung herself on him. Her warmth was so foreign, he tried to back up, but felt the need to comfort her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and sat her up off his chest. Her eyes went directly to his expecting some sort of kiss as they fell to focus in on his lips. 

"Don't cry," any other boy would have wiped away those tears. "Just-" Chuin knew not what he could tell her to make things better in her world, when we couldn't even help himself in his. He couldn't just sit there and have her eyes search his for answers that were not there. It was all just too painful. "Just-" he took one last look at her, "Stay pretty." he ran.

Passing Zane's home in his fast pace, a pair of eyes caught Chuin, "Zane-"

"You know I love her." was all he heard from the shadows. The voice was hurt, the wound was deep and it still bled.

"I don't-"

"The word is out," Zane took a step forward, but still staying mysteriously hidden. "Why didn't you tell me earlier? Afraid you would _hurt_ me?"

"I hadn't known she would come up to me like that," attempting to explain was all Chuin could do. "Zane, I don't like her; she is yours."  
"Is that so?" Zane cocked his head to the side. "Well what an _unhappy_ marriage that'll be."

"What?" Chuin was confused.

"Your father told me," Zane shook his head with something deep in his mind. "Erato's father chose you to marry her; some deals involved, but she's yours. How could you?" 

"I didn't know-" 

"A lie!" Zane spat. Chuin's eyes searched for mercy. His best friend, compainion since first memory was breaking a friendship over a girl neither loved. With trust broken, Chuin felt his heart ache. He would lose all the happiness in his life if only he could keep Zane by his side.

"Friend," he begged. "I speak honest words. I heard this arrangement from you for the first time. Erato, she is not for me. I have no feelings for her."

"None of that means a thing," Zane shook his head that hung low. "She is still your bride." he spat again, "_Friend._"

"I-" Chuin struggled to get out the sound of words, but now the tears would stream down his face, "I-I lov-" Instead Chuin choked on the sounds he coughed up.

"I hate you." Zane's words were solid. Cold. Chuin was suddenly so cold, so numb. The wind that had been so gentle before, now unkindly hit his cheeks and froze the tears that would stain pale white cheeks remaining for eternity. Zane was gone. Chuin left alone under the night sky of stars that each seemed to be a needle that stabbed him all at once. He would drown that night.

***

High grass blew along the river that bordered Karauchi. The water would be kind in the warm weather. Untying his top, Chuin also undid his ponytail. Long dark hair flew in the wind, yet a few strains were stuck to his wet cheeks. His paces were numbered in a smooth stride to the water. The current was strong, day and night it would grab and hold tight. His bare feet felt the ground turn sand in the shallowness of the flow.

Tilting his head back, he saw the stars above for a final time. He wasn't meant for this world. _This was never my world._ he figured no one would understood this pain and confusion he faced day to day. Life wasn't worth living if this was all a heart could feel. 

Looking back down ahead of him, Chuin's heart skipped a beat as it was shocked to see the boy had appeared a foot away from him. Chuin hadn't felt his presence appear this time. 

"Who are you?" Chuin sucked up as many tears as he could to sound normal. He knew that they shimmered and had been seen in the round moon's light that lit their faces.

"Does it matter?" the question was a surprise and he got to the point. "I came to speak to you." Chuin's mind was read, "You feel differently than everyone else." 

"I-I hurt." unconsciencely Chuin opened up.

"How?" he dug deeper. "You hurt in the heart, yes?"

"My hearts an internal blood clot," Chuin felt as if he spoke what came. "I picked at it – it never heals, it never goes away."

"It bleeds for a friend." a statement, not a question.

"I would have told him then," Chuin inhaled deeply not sure how he felt this so clearly. "He was the only thing that I could love in this dying world." Tears blurred everything and choked his words, "But the simple word of 'love' itself, has all ready died and went _away_!" To his knees, he fell with his hands holding all his tears. It was then that he felt his own cry aloud. He hadn't spoken a word prior to his first question.

"Y-you're in my head!" he was wanting to run.

"I am not invading, am I?" the boy's dry lips never moved nor twitched. 

"What is it that you want?" Chuin didn't feel the need to waste his breath.

"To talk to you," he sounded innocent enough in Chuin's head. This surprised Chuin to realize that the presence now wasn't dark, it was just barely there.

"You've caught me at a rather bad time." 

"I don't think I would be able to catch you at anytime tomorrow." the voice seemed comfortable within Chuin's skull. "I never understood why someone would wish to kill themselves, it's rather weak."

"Than I am weak," Chuin didn't care. "and I don't suppose you ever felt love like I do."

"You want to be happy," he seemed to want to be leading the conversation. The wind blew through them and made Chuin's skin cold to even his own touch.

"I just want them to be happy!" 

"Together?"

"Yes!" pause. "No!" confusion. "Stop questioning me!" hands over his ears, it did no good. This boy was in control and would read Chuin's emotions until he was satisfied. 

"Your thoughts, your feelings, they're interesting." the boy turned his back to Chuin, but looked back over his shoulder to say aloud, "Stay around. I'll see what happens, Tomo." 

Tomo? He recognized the name as if he'd heard it before, but it was fresh to his ears. Tomo. Chuin looked up at the stars in the sky. His tears were dry and all he could hear was the water flowing and the wind in his ears. It didn't surprise him that the boy was gone when he looked down. He wasn't sure of anything at that point, not his feelings, not his identity. Not even why he turned around and went home that night.

***

Zane wasn't at training the next day. Chuin continued the day with enthusiasm as to not give himself a second to think his own thoughts. Concentration was the key, yet only once he glanced over his right shoulder to see Erato gazing in his direction. He tried not to think of her sad eyes. Keeping his back to her, he could only let himself imagine that those eyes had shifted to someone else.

***

The news Zane had given Chuin had been the truth. A marriage was arranged. His father would get a hefty sum of money as long as Chuin was wed to Erato whose father would begin a partnership for trading matters in which he needed many allies. There was no set date, but it would come. 

Zane was lost. He would never return to be Chuin's friend. Passing his home on the way to his own, Chuin drew his eyes away from the house as tears returned.

Chuin now only felt an urge to leave this town and everyone in it. He'd never lived a happy life there. Zane had been his happiness. The hours each day he'd spent with his best friend were wasted now. Erato, she'd only complicate things. She'd already destroyed his friendship, now she would take away his freedom to love. Although he knew the happiness it'd bring her, he couldn't marry someone he didn't love. She'd be able to find another who'd be able to take care of her the way Chuin couldn't.

Never having been beyond the walls of the town, Chuin knew there truly was no possible way he could leave. He'd have no direction, no destination. To go blind would be a foolish choice. The only option Chuin would have now would be to talk his father out of the arrangement, but even that he knew wouldn't go well.

***

Kneeling before his father, Chuin kept his eyes low waiting to be spoken to. Inscents smoked between them relaxing the evening air. Gentle was everything in that room, "What is it that you approach me for, my son?"

"Father," he spoke softly afraid of what he had to say. 

"You are troubled?"

"Yes,"

"With what?" he seemed to know. "Marriage is a large part of manhood."

"Yes, I know." Chuin nodded still his eyes were low. "I came to resign." This hit his father. 

"What!" sharp eyes broke the calmness

"Father, I can't."

"No, you will." 

"I do not love her."

"You will." his father was stern and hard now. 

"I do not love any girl," Chuin knew this wasn't something his father didn't already know.

"That is not for you to decide." the red of the man's face was bright. "No, you will not back down for it will embarrass our name."

"The name is not my own." this was a mistake to point out.

"I took you in," the man's voice was dangerous now. "Care for you when your true parents left you to die!" so harsh that Chuin's vision blurred.   
"They didn't care for you. I did. Is this how you would repay _them?_"

Thrown back by not only the tone and volume of his father's voice, the words sent Chuin crawling backwards. Chuin begged, "Father, you do not understand." 

"I made a deal with a good and powerful friend," the room's relaxation was gone. "You will do as you are told."

"Father-"

"You _will_ make her a happy bride!"

"I-" 

"Disobey me and you will be banished, disowned and your name will bring dishonor to any who utter it!" An arm raised high forced Chuin to run. Where he was headed, he knew not, but he ran. With tears of fear in his eyes he ran. Through the town lit only by the lanterns inside the houses. In his head, he felt that he would not return. Not to his father. Not to marriage. Not to this life.

A cry came from a house on his left that was so short that he was surprised his ears were able to pick it up. "What?! Rather than be thankful for your life in a warm home you would rather live on the streets as a whore! Abuse the beauty your father has nurtured in this fine living, you ungrateful child!" The snap of a slap struck Chuin that he pushed himself to looking into a crack. Inside what would have normally seemed to be a cozy home was Erato upon the floor holding her cheek, which was red from the slap and seemed stained from tears from before, but they continued to rewet themselves. Her father's face, red as blood stared down at her with a death glare.

Chuin looked down at her hand gripping tight to her robes, shook in fear of the next blow from the raised bulk arm of her father. There would be none. Chuin wouldn't allow it. Bursting in it took them both by surprise. "Don't touch her!" Chuin screamed. The death glare shifted to him, but no action was able to be taken for Chuin grabbed Erato's shaking hand pulling her with him out the door. He didn't know where they would run to, but they ran. 

A horse, left outside for the night by a passing traveler made a complete getaway capable. Chuin climbed upon the horse's back and looked down to Erato stretching out his hand, "Will you come with me?" he wouldn't lock eyes, though she tried. In all seriousness the moment seemed still.

"Only if-" she caught his eyes. She needed to see into his soul before she was able to make a decision. His soul was confused and lost, but it would find its way. Purity was all she needed to feel. Over her shoulder, she look one last look at the peaceful dark town she had grown up in and been kept within her entire life. Ahead of them the full bright moon would light their unpaved path into the world. She looked back up him. Gallant he sat there on the horse looking down at her. "We never come back." He took her arm and pulled her up.

***

Having passed through a desert in the night, they arrived in a forest just as the sun brought the day's light. The wind rushing past their faces had spoken for them the entire ride through the desert. Yet Chuin's arms around Erato holding the horse's reins spoke a different language comforting to her. He was the only one she knew she could truly be safe with. When they stopped to rest at a creek they stayed together. Staring through the tall tree's branches at the sky Erato wanted to sit back in Chuin's arms, but felt it would make him uncomfortable, so instead she just rested her head on a fallen tree. Her eyes would beg to close, but she wanted to stay awake under the sun.

"Sleep." he splashed a bit of water on his face. "I'll watch over you."

"Where are we going?" she had to know before she drifted off.

"I'm not sure yet," he washed off his hands in the cool flowing water. "There should be a town not far from here if I'm correct; we'll get food there." They hadn't brought anything with them with such an abrupt dismissal to their surroundings. "Now sleep some, you'll need the energy."

Seeing her sleep, he turned to the creek and dunked his face in being careful to not wet his hair. Where were they? He hadn't a clue where the hell they were, none the less where they'd end up. She'd sleep easier knowing they had a destination. He was sure he would too and that was why he hadn't even bothered trying to sleep.


	2. Somewhere Between Point A and Point B

Author's Note: I have an idea where this story is heading, but if you have any suggestions, opinions on characters, or ideas – I'd love to hear them __

Author's Note: I have an idea where this story is heading, but if you have any suggestions, opinions on characters, or ideas – I'd love to hear them! - Psyche

Chuin had thought a large amount on the ride across the desert. Erato, she would complicate things, but she wasn't someone he could have just left behind. He may not like her, but he didn't have the heart to abandon her in that situation. She had been in the same situation as he had. On only that level could they relate. Though now, he knew she'd stay with him and would be harder to shake off. 

Their journey continued through the forest that led on through the day. Riding without sleep Chuin drifted off a bit, it was the horse that led the way. Allowing his eyelids to fall, Chuin could have sworn he heard Zane call his name. Perking back up, he looked at his surroundings. The bright green forest seemed to go on forever, and would be dangerous during the night. So as the sun set Chuin began to worry.

"I thought you said there was a town out here," Erato asked after they had dismounted the house in a small clearing.

"We must have gone in the wrong direction," he kept lying, "Either that or its still further on, but we can't ride during the night, it's just too dangerous."

"I don't want to sleep here." 

"Well one of us should stay awake at all times-"

"I don't want to be here." through the last rays of the sun, he could see the fear in her eyes. He looked down, away from them.

"I don't want to be here either," he confessed. "I don't know where we are. There's no town out there. I don't know why I'm lying-" it was as if she hadn't heard a word, because she had turned her back to him.

"Chuin..." she spun around, eyes searching frantically. "Where's the horse?" Scanning the trees around them, he could have sworn he'd tied the horse to one of them. It could have gotten loose, but how far could it have wandered? "I'm scared-" she grabbed him by the arm and clung on as if he could protect her like a warrior. It really wasn't the role he was fit to play, but he had to be the man now.

"Now, it's got to be-" taking a step forward was the wrong thing to do because it was too close to the wrong bush from where a rope flung out around their ankles. 

"Ha! Got them!" a quick handed figure secured them at the ankles before tending to their wrists. A hard fall to the ground knocked Erato out cold, and Chuin saw this, but decided after hearing this figure's voice, he'd close his eyes and play unconscious, "Hello there, _ladies_."

***

It turned out that there had been a city near by at the edge of the forest. Chuin wouldn't find this all out until later, but when he opened his eyes from what turned out to be a dreamless sleep, he was in a windowless room with a single door. There was the muffled sound of loud talking and laughing coming from the other side of the door, all of which came from deep male voices. Erato laid still by his side, both were bound hand and foot and the only light was coming from a lamp in the corner.

Sitting there in confusion as to where he was and what to do, Chuin had to have been there for a good half-hour before someone opened the door. By this time he'd thought far enough ahead to stuff his shirt as to play a role he could handle. With his hair down, he hid some of the more masculine edges of his face. Though he was quite the bishounen and his pretty eyes could pass him as a female.

"Come on," the dirty man came in through the door holding a club and kicked Erato to wake her up. "It's time to sell yourselves." They were untied at the ankles, but were handicap with their hands. Chuin was on his feet as Erato was opening her eyes. Hurried out into an open tavern-type atmosphere, there had to be fifteen or so men drinking away their lives. Chuin knew his training would have been useful if there'd only been a handful of them, but he knew he was well out numbered. Erato's shaking hand already had his as she stepped on his ankles behind him. Ugly faces grinned to them and made remarks. Chuin shuttered at their appearances having always kept himself exceptionally well groomed. 

"What pretty hair," Chuin felt the filthy fingers twirl pieces of his thick long hair. Knowing it would not be wise to hit a man twice his size, he instead clutched his fists tightly absorbing his own anger.

"I prefer males," a voice tickled his ear, but Chuin didn't feel the warmth of a breath. "Don't you?" turning only his eyes, there stood the boy. The blue haired creature that could get into Chuin's head and speak to him stood so close that it caused Chuin to back up. He glared at the boy who seemed to jest, "If you would like me to assist you, you'll have to stop looking at me so coldly." It was as he spoke that Chuin felt the ropes bounding his hands being untied, he would then quickly tend to Erato.

"I know where you like to be touched," Erato backed away from men's hands and closer to Chuin who wasn't feeling the circulation of his hand.

_Can you get us out of here_? Chuin knew he only had to think it since the boy obviously had ways of getting in his head. 

"See that man near the door behind the counter?" the boy spoke clearly filling Chuin's thoughts. "He's out." That was all Chuin had to hear, though the boy kept speaking as dragging Erato behind him, he climbed upon the counter lined with men. Aware this would attract attention, Chuin knew what had to be done. 

As if there was a bouncing beat playing loudly in the background, Chuin became the perky little dancer Erato had been at the festival. There wasn't much he could do besides flash his eyes at the gawking men and pose. Erato's hand was all that had her swaying with the what seemed like crazy boy. Her worried eyes kept jumping from the dancer to the hungry men. Frozen there on the counter, her stiff muscles didn't twitch once Chuin let go of her. Coming around the still Erato, Chuin had to spin her around, reach down her shirt, take out a piece of underclothing and toss it into the wild crowd of men. With the most of them distracted with the bait, Chuin pulled Erato behind the counter and out their only exit. 

__

Pigs. Chuin would later work hard to get that memory to disappear.

Discovering that they were in a rather large city, it was night and the streets were lit by lanterns. Erato stumbled behind as the two ran from the whore-selling tavern. Chuin wasn't sure where the boy had gone, but he didn't have time to worry about that now. They had no money, no destination, no clue as to their own whereabouts. Even the stars couldn't guide them now with the city's light pollution. There were few people out at the hour and they tried to stay away from the shadows not knowing who or what lurked within them. 

"Hey!" Chuin turned a corner hearing the call of that boy's familiar voice. 

"I can't run anymore," Erato collapsed to her knees. Out of breath she had trouble breathing. "My chest, its on fire. I can't keep going."

"Come _on_." Chuin urged her. He stopped feet away ahead of the fallen Erato worried that he had lost the boy.

"Are you alright?" from behind came a different voice. In the moonlight, Chuin saw an older man kneel down to Erato's aid. Looking back ahead of him, the boy was gone. "You two girls know you shouldn't be out at this hour alone."

"We don't have anywhere to go. We're lost." Chuin could have smacked Erato for giving a stranger such information. It was then that he could have brought the lash upon himself for thinking of hurting someone the way their fathers would have. Trying to rearrange his thoughts, he barely heard the old man,

"Come with me," helping Erato to her feet, he spoke kindly. "My wife and I live down this way. You are welcomed to stay with us. Please, come." Chuin blinked realizing he was being spoken to and seeing no other way to go, he followed.


	3. Rearranging The World Within The Mind

Author's Blah-Blah: Hey – thanks for reading this far into my story

Author's Blah-Blah:_ Hey – thanks for reading this far into my story! _Coming_ up _ahead_ is some Yaoi (no pun intended... – though if you didn't catch it don't go back and look). For all who aren't familiar with the phrase; _Yaoi_ is 'boy love' (and if you think that its all cuddly-boy love stop reading...). Its OK if you didn't know, we all find out someway or another, what these dirty words mean...some better than others, but that's all just another story for another time._

I'm trying to get better that the formatting and the spacing of the story (sorry it was so sloppy for the first 2 chapters). _You may be noticing that the story matures with the characters...um...yeah, well I'm glad you noticed. _

***

Morning seeped through the windows and onto Chuin's face, though opening his eyes he looked up to see Erato staring down over him. They had slept on a single mat together, also sharing a blanket due to the old man's lack of guest supplies. "Hey Pretty." she smiled at his brown eyes. Sitting up quickly, he backed away and blinked recalling their situation. Put in a back room, they understood that the old man had been poor and living with his wife.

A door opened up just then and in looked an older woman with gray hair. "You're awake, come eat." she smiled with the invitation, her wrinkles displaying her age and she went back into the main room of the small house where a table was set for four. 

"It's a good thing I found you two girls last night," the old man sat eating his breakfast. "Otherwise I'm not sure where you would have ended up."

"Renchan!" his wife scolded, and turned kindly to Chuin, "His eyes are poor now at his age, he means no unkindness." Kneeling to eat, Chuin discovered how he hadn't had anything to eat since they had left Karauchi. There was quite a bit of food considering only the two, who introduced themselves as Sincuin and Renchan lived in the house. They welcomed Chuin and Erato as if they were children finally returning home, "Our own have grown and left." explained Sincuin. "Oh, how quiet it has become." she sighed with memories. 

"Why, if you were to want to stay," Renchan was red with joy like a father. "You have no destination or home, so our house is yours." 

"Thank you!" Erato was accepting while Chuin just continued to eat his breakfast quietly.

***

"Imagine, we'll be like brother and sister." Erato's new optimism was beginning to annoy Chuin. The two were given money to fetch a fish for dinner. The day had been spent making the backroom into a bedroom for the two to share. 

Finding time to sit aside and think, Chuin discovered some things that had been resting on his mind. Just like when he had drifted off on the horse, in his dreams Chuin heard the voice of his best friend calling him. He didn't want to let go of a best friend or a first love. Part of him missed his home where he could go expecting routine, instead of this new unpredictable atmosphere. 

"I don't know..." his voice trailed not very aware that he had spoken. 

"Don't know what?" Erato was concerned about his gaze drifting away. He also wondered how different things would be if he hadn't taken her with him. All that they'd been through so far may have been completely altered had he been traveling solo.

"I don't know if I'm going to stay." he summed up his thoughts.

"What about me?"

"You can stay here forever if you like," he shrugged a bit. "This may be a good place for you to live a normal life, but its not for me."

"If you leave, so do I." how he had wished that she didn't say that. "I'll stay with you no matter what. You've gotten me this far." there was a moment's silence."I had thought you to be shy," she brought up out of the blue.

"I don't know what happened then," Chuin still struggled to get the memory to die. "Let's not speak of it now." 

"I'll need new-"

"You'll get what you need." he was aggravated, not just with her, but in his thoughts. "Let's just _not talk _right now."

Suddenly a man with a painted face appeared dancing around in the crowd holding up a sign that read, _Opera; Performance at noon_. 

Opera. Chuin's face lit up. He remembered the traveling performers in their attire that he had fallen so deeply in love with. Forgetting that there was an errand they had to run, Chuin changed routes and headed for the small theater. He hadn't dragged Erato along this time, so it was a surprise to see her still by his side after he snuck in without paying. There was a simple scene set up on a small stage where the actors would come out as characters in a story that they would perform. Though the show was only presented once, it was played over a million times more in Chuin's head that night. 

He wondered if instead of staying with this couple, he could travel with the opera and perform as they did. Become one of them. He felt he'd sleep peacefully that night, but instead fell into a dark dream. That feeling he had felt the first time the unmistakable blue haired boy laid eyes upon him crawled under his skin again. He stood in dark apparel grinning. _Who are you?_ Chuin was awake in a lucid dream. 

"Call me a _guardian angel_." the boy smirked confusing Chuin with the phrase. "I know all about you, remember? I know you feel things, even things you don't wish to. I also know that you're just not aware that once you're in touch with the reality of the world, you can alter things, rearrange minds." Chuin tried to process every word individually, but it would only later make more sense. "I bear a gift," in an outstretched hand, the boy offered a small clam that seemed to glow with light when it opened. Chuin's eyes fell closed and he was in a different scene. One of his school under the tree blooming with pink spring flowers. Under the sun, it was peaceful with the calm sound of a running stream beneath the bridge Chuin stood on next to Zane. _Zane_. Chuin smiled seeing his friend's face. Without realizing it, his hand stroked Zane's soft cheek. It was warm. It was real. Though as quickly as he had felt the touch, Chuin drew away, _Its just a dream_. He felt the need to remind himself as to not get lost in those eyes Zane had. 

"No," the boy leaned on the same bridge next to the two boys. "It's an illusion; you are in _shin_. Open your eyes." It was the strangest feeling, since Chuin could have sworn his eyes were all ready open. He lifted his eyelids to be back in that dark nothingness looking strait ahead at the dark stare of the boy. As if he was exhaling a deep breath, a large amount of Chuin's energy was immediately drained out of him. "That was your chi that did that." Having always wondered what it would be like to feel actual energy within him, Chuin was shocked at the reaction his body had to it. He needed air, he was breathing heavy and would soon be very lightheaded.

"Keep it," the spirit's voice was now slowly becoming an echo. "You'll teach yourself to use it, Tomo."

***

"Tomo?" he still heard the name as he broke out of the vision. "Tomo? Whose Tomo?" It was Erato's voice that had unraveled from the spirit's. 

"Do you always wake before me?" Chuin sat up quickly seeing her lying like a wife next to him awake. 

"You woke me," she sensed the bad mood he'd come out of sleep in. "You were saying 'Tomo'. Who is that? The boy you fantasize about in your sleep?" 

"I don't know-" he was about to break into a mind-you-own-business rant, but his anger caused him to clutch his fists and discover a small object in his palm. Opening his right hand he held what appeared to be a normal clam. There was no way that this could have come from the dream... 

Quickly hiding it from Erato's sight in his hand, he got up and fetched his shirt.

***

In the back of his head he had feared what he'd find that day, the opera had continued moving on and he was left behind. If he had known what lay ahead of the city Chuin would have gone in search of the traveling players, but again it was Erato's call to breakfast that brought him back to where she was. 

Days would pass and the couple made living with them more and more normal as if they truly were a family. Chuin did as the spirit told him and taught himself how the use _shin_. Unable to stabilize his energy and ration it wisely, the illusions he created didn't last more than a minute or so. It would take time before he would be able to create a place to hide when he didn't want to be around Erato or the couple. 

Though he also found other ways to pass the time, one being the creation of Tomo. Chuin knew that he and Tomo were the same. It was the tattoo on his hip that told him so. Every time Chuin used _shin_ he brought Tomo to life feeling the birthmark's radiance. It represented his chi.

Sincuin could sew and saving his own money, Chuin would buy fine fabrics for a costume he designed from the memories of the opera. The colors were brilliant, red, yellow, and black; each held its own significance. Putting his hair up high he found two long black and white feathers to piece into the strains. It was as if he was an insect with two antennas that with enough concentration of his chi, he could use as exploratory arms. He could move anything he wanted with his chi, but it would be long before he could use it as a weapon.

"Hey Pretty," Erato found him one afternoon sitting in front of his mirror dressed in full garb squandering time simply admiring himself. It wasn't that time brought them as friends closer, nor as anything more. They became siblings, getting along while always quarrelling over simple things.

He didn't turn to her, but only let his eyes shift. She brought for him a small red cloth box that she kneeled down next to him with. "I bought this for you," She opened up the box's lid. "I know how much you love the opera and when I saw this, I knew what your costume had been missing." He looked down at the box of face paint that laid her in lap.

Studying his face, she gently stroked it with paint that she applied on the tips of her fingers. They faced each other now as she began to work. Every layer felt more and more relaxing and releasing to Chuin. A man. He felt as if he was becoming a man. Erato knew, but still touched him with such care as if he was as fragile as glass.

She was finished. Admiring his face, her work, her lips curved into such a kind smile. Chuin knew that her eyes still saw something she couldn't have, but she felt it was all something she could nurture and stay close to. So locked on his face, she hadn't noticed his fingers in the blue paint. Cool, she felt it on her lips. He then applied a single layer meant to represent the kiss he couldn't give her.

***

__

--5 years later--

Tomo ran his hand across the bare peach colored skin. Longing eyes looked up at the partner he craved. In a romantic stone room, transparent sheets were curtained around the large bed blowing only with strong gusts coming from the cool bright night blew. The blonde hair man that lay in the sheets, was built strong, but in Tomo's hands made weak. "I love the way you smack my ass." Tomo felt aroused hearing the fine man speak. "I love the dirty things you do."

"I have control of you." he grinned looming over the pet that would never tire from their practice. The smooth surface of his red nails breathed gently on the man's chest as Tomo ran the back of his hand over his wet skin. Tomo could feel the male become brick in between his legs.

"I need to feel you." inhaling Tomo listened as he licked his way south. "You need to feel me."

Suddenly it was his stomach that called to him and the thought of the real time broke Tomo's concentration. 

The orange sun blinded him when he returned to reality. Holding his left arm up to shield his eyes he felt his chi descend. Leaning back on the trunk of a tree, he sat out in the tall grass facing the setting sun that had the sky a mix of light blue, purple, and bright pink with clouds that seemed as if they were being sucked into the same hole the sun fell into. 

"Tomo!" hearing his name, Tomo turned his head seeing Erato waving her arm wildly summoning him for the last meal of the day. Rising dressed in his casual clothes, Tomo placed his _shin_ safely in his pocket and headed towards the small house. Sincuin was kneeled at her place at the table set for three when he entered. After Renchan had passed away four years before, the three decided to move away from the dangerous city and out to the peaceful land surrounding it. 

When Sincuin sighed, it signed that she had something on her mind, "Are you alright, good mother?" Erato asked without hesitation. Tomo had kneeled down and began eating, only his eyes looked up at the conversation. 

"I've been thinking about your futures." putting down her chopsticks she confronted them on her thoughts. "Renchan had always imagined you two marrying each other," she smiled weakly. "Though I don't think he understood Chuin." Tomo allowed the kind old woman to call him what she wanted despite what he looked like. They were now used to him wearing his face paint everyday all day, which entitled them to call him 'Tomo' since he was no longer Chuin. "Though you'll need a man to take care of you, Erato." she nodded hearing the woman. Erato had always been two years younger than Tomo and was now nineteen, the age to wed or miss the youth catch. Her hair was still it's ivory blonde that shined with her cool eyes. Her skills in the cultural woman role were well learned so she would make an ideal wife.

"Then I will search for a husband starting tomorrow," she said this solemnly to end the woman's worries, but her feelings weren't in her words. 

It was after the meal that Erato approached Tomo when Sincuin wasn't around, "Tomo-chan, I have an idea." he could practically read her thoughts, she was far too predictable.

"I am not going to marry you." he replied not looking away from his own reflection as he gently brushed his hair.

"We wouldn't have to-" she paused twirling her hair around a finger displaying her uncomfortable position. "_Do_ anything."

"No."  
"Its only so that I don't-" he didn't let her finished, hushing her by turning around to face her. His eyes were what cut her off.

"No." she wasn't stupid and was gradually maturing mentally, but none the less she was still the Erato who never seemed to catch on quickly.

"Chuin-" she was about to start begging, but was practically thrown back by his tone.

"Don't call me that!" _Not while I am dressed like this_. He was glaring, which was partly why he was surprised when she fought back.

"I'll chant it if I want." she'd had enough of being silenced by the rising of his voice. "Sometimes I don't know who you've become. Your so vain, its as if you're never not in front of a mirror, yet I've almost forgotten what your face looks like. You have turned cold ever since you've become _Tomo_, I feel it." He wrinkled his face as if she was crazy and speaking a language he didn't understand.

"How is that so?" he asked her as if she was really dumb. "I was never _warm_ to you."

"You were," she held back her tears, he saw. "You once told me I was beautiful. You took me with you and took care of me. I don't understand why you're so mean now."

"Why do I need to be kind?" he didn't care what she had to say. "I never liked you. I only took you with me because-" his mind strained to remember. "because I had to. Stop clinging to me; I'm not your brother. I never was. You've just brainwashed yourself. I'm not even your friend." That had gone too far. Tears streamed down Erato's pale cheeks displaying her broken heart.

"My real brother wouldn't abandon me like this." 

"Then find him." Tomo had had enough and began to ignore her looking at his comb.

"I may never be your sister," she shook her head backing away. "And I don't know why, but I'll always be your friend." she was able to say only so much before she broke and had to run from him hiding her face. Tomo's eyes fell. He sighed. Looking back at the mirror he continued to brush his hair. 


	4. Whats A Legend If Its Real

The next day Erato disappeared

The next day Erato disappeared. She hadn't asked to leave, so she was alone. Tomo knew she'd have to return, she couldn't survive out there, not alone. Yet doubt fell upon him once the sun went down. Where could she be that had her out so late? As a look out, Tomo sat up on the roof looking out at the only dirt road that led to the house. It was mainly open fields that surrounded the dwelling, a tree here and there, but he would be able to see anything coming under the full moon.

"Has she come yet, Tomo?" the old woman was terribly worried.

"Please sleep, Sincuin-sama." He looked down at her hanging out the window. "I'll be out here all night; she'll come home."  
"Oh dear," the woman's thoughts overwhelmed her. "Could it have been the talk of a husband that drove her out? Did she not want to marry-"

"Sleep Sincuin-sama," Tomo would have to plea. "It wasn't your fault," _It was probably mine_. Tomo had already thought up all the possibilities. Erato returning to Karauchi to her brother was the best he could logically figure. "Please, Erato would want you to sleep."

"If she would, then she'd be here." Sincuin muttered before turning in reminding Tomo to make sure he slept some that night. He set his chin on his arms that were crossed resting on his knees and stared strait out into the night. He felt the urge to just drift off then, but something deep inside kept him awake and alert. Maybe it was Erato's voice stuck in his head from the argument the night before. Or it was Zane's telling him to take care of her,

"Love her when I can't." the illusion smiled. Tomo could have stayed all day in the green grass staring up through the branches of the tree twitching with the breeze. Lying to his left, his best friend was set as if nothing had happened to their friendship.

"And him when I can't." Erato appeared above them handing each a red paper rose. She kneeled down and stroked Zane's dark hair making him look up and smile at her kind eyes. Tomo had just watched. They were their sixteen-year-old selves as he preserved Zane to be in his memory. Only once had he ever created an older man who resembled the lost friend, though it had only been for Tomo's own comfort, anything more would have felt wrong. He had played around with _shin_ making artificial personalities for those he knew, but when they were their true selves, he felt comfortable because it was then that they seemed all too real. 

"What can I say to you except, I love you?" she now held Zane's head in her lap letting her hair fall to curtain their faces. Never before had Tomo included Erato in any of his personal illusions. It had been that day that she disappeared did he feel the need for her presence. Now to see Zane happy, and feel their warmth, Tomo felt like he could relax without his make-up on. "I know we are the lucky ones." he heard Erato speak to him. Turning to her, he smiled.

Shifting his eyes, Tomo had just recalled the illusion as a memory. He still searched the open night for Erato. Softly, as if traveling only as an echo came the galloping sound of a horse's hooves. Fully alert, Tomo then saw an approaching horse traveling solo, yet it carried two passengers on its back. Tomo jumped down from the roof with grace hanging back in the shadows unsure of who it was that was there. Approaching the clearing quickly, the horse was pulled to a sudden stop and the second larger rider dismounted and assisted the other rider.

"Erato." Tomo's voice turned the large male's head quickly. 

"_Chuin_." she addressed him solemnly, not happy to see him.

"Sincuin is worrying herself to headaches," if he hadn't known her face so well, Tomo wouldn't have been able to recognize Erato. The three were just dark figures to each other. "How were you so foolish to leave like that?" 

"He isn't my brother." Erato ignored Tomo's question and had her attention to the man standing tall and bold behind her. "He has only _brainwashed_ himself to believe so." Tomo's eyes were slits with anger barley acknowledging the stranger until he spoke.

"Well, he must care enough about you to wait for you in this fashion," the deep voice seemed to calm both of them down. Stepping forward, the man's hair seemed gold in the moonlight. "I am Nakago-"

"My fiancé." Erato clung to him. Only then did Tomo see her vengeful smile.

***

"You came for permission?" Sincuin had discovered the new guest that morning and was frantic making extra food. Seeing the blue eyed, blonde hair man with the smiling Erato she seemed to forget about the day of worry before. Kneeling silently in front of his meal, Tomo was observing that Erato knew what she was doing. She was fully aware that he favored the rare blonde hair men

"To have Erato as my wife," Nakago didn't seem like one who'd smile much naturally. It was as if he was making himself ill forcing the ends of his mouth upward. Nakago truly did reminded Tomo a bit of his pet in his own personal illusions, but Nakago was bolder, stronger, harder. Tomo's eyes were kept low as to keep his breath from being taken away by simply the sight of this man.

"You say you're from the city?" Sincuin seemed so proud that Erato had caught such a solider. 

"Palace, actually." Nakago explained. "I am an assistant of the emperor." That was enough to have the woman satisfied. 

"You have my permission," turning to Tomo, Sincuin felt it was also up to him. "Tomo?"

"Tomo?" Nakago repeated it and that was when Tomo looked up. 

"Its his nickname when he has his make-up on," Erato must have explained it all to him before because seeing Tomo for the first time Nakago didn't question his appearance nor seem even the least bit taken back like most strangers often were.

"Where did you get it from?" Tomo felt put on the spot.

"It was given to me," Tomo wasn't sure how to justify it. 

"By whom?" Why was he asking so many questions?

"A friend, a long time ago." Tomo was about to ask what the importance of this information was, but Nakago's steady nod seemed content with his answers. 

"Did you know Erato can cook?" Sincuin changed the subject with a bright smile.

***

Tomo hadn't expected Nakago to show such an interest in him being that Nakago's purpose there was Erato. She and Sincuin were packing the necessaries for Erato's departure and it was then that Nakago approached Tomo sitting out in the grass where he usually fantasized being that he was often left alone there.

"Why did you become Tomo?" Nakago asked him phrasing the question as if he knew something more. Tomo didn't look at him at first while he thought, _It gave me an identity. Gave me a spirit that had able me to live the life I didn't have. That spirit came with the _shin_, which handed me an entirely new outlook on this so-called reality that creates the world we live in. Tomo is who I am when I alter the world Chuin lived in. My emotions are clearer now. I don't cry as I had. I don't feel that way anymore because now I have an outlet. I have an identity. _

"I don't know." Tomo stared ahead.

"Have you ever heard of the legend of the Four Gods?" Tomo searched in the back of his head recalling something of that nature having been once told to him by his 'father'. 

"That a maiden from another world would come one day and bring peace to Kotou." Tomo recited all that he knew of it. 

"And the guardians of the maiden would come together," Nakago nodded. "Each bearing a symbol of their constellation." He pulled aside his blonde bangs to reveal a blue symbol on his forehead that Tomo hadn't noticed before. It wasn't that he hadn't seen it, but it had just now appeared.

Feeling his own symbol inked on his hip Tomo's eyes were wide with disbelief. What did this all mean? 

"Tomo," Nakago spoke his name and it made his skin tingle. "You are one of the seven Seiryuu Guardians." It was hard to conceive what Nakago was telling him. It was all just a legend, how could he be part of it? If it had been any other person telling him this, he would have turned away, but Nakago's eyes drew him in. "Will you come with me to the capital of Kotou and help me search for the other seishi?' The definition of 'no' was erased from Tomo's mind. 

***

Erato wasn't informed of Tomo's company to the palace until the morning they left. Sincuin was in tears seeing her 'children' leaving her, but knew it was for the best. Erato either didn't want to believe that Tomo was joining them or she just didn't understand why, "Just when I thought I was getting rid of you." she'd say. 

"Ditto." Tomo had all his belongings bundled and attached to his horse's saddle. 

"Return one day," Sincuin waved them off. "Bring me grandchildren!" Erato kissed her head once more, and mounted the white horse sitting in front of Nakago. Tomo did the same, but got on his own horse ready to leave this portion of his life behind him as he did the last; never looking back at it.

It was a lengthy ride to the palace and the lack of participation Tomo had in the conversations made it longer. He just concentrated on his anger towards Erato. This was the second time she'd ruined his life. More or so he felt he'd brought it upon himself having brought her with him all this way. Though it was now that she brought him along. He owed her that much.

Erato wanted to talk about the wedding and beautiful married life, but Nakago had to explain to her that it'd be postponed a short time since he and Tomo had 'business' to attend to. The palace was a place she hadn't ever been before so she wouldn't be bored; especially after she met the first seishi Nakago had found.


	5. The Stars Will Come Together

First and foremost, I've just got to mention that the idea for the beginning of this chapter, I got from another fanfic I read a while back so I won't take full credit for it __

First and foremost, I've just got to mention that the idea for the beginning of this chapter, I got from another fanfic I read a while back so I won't take full credit for it. A major note that I've got to point out is that I made a change in the first couple chapters, that the strange boy who keeps popping up now has blue hair – not black – yeah, if you know your Fushigi Yuugi, you'll have an idea as to where this is going. I just wanted those who are reading this before the change to be aware of that. 

BTW if you haven't all ready, check out my site where I've got some pictures of characters from this story posted at http://www.angelfire.com/il3/angelz/fy.html 

***

"Emperor, I have found another one of the seven Seishi," Nakago presented Tomo to the emperor who sat sloppily on his throne in the extravagant and immense palace. Tomo felt the large man's eyes look at him with disgust so he never met them with his own.

"Why is he dressed like that?" the Emperor wanted to know.

"He is Tomo, one who works with illusions," Nakago and Tomo had spoken before the meeting with the Emperor and Nakago would do all the talking, while Tomo did the demonstrating.

With his _shin_ in hand, his chi pulled the Emperor into where Tomo could slip inside of his head to create an atmosphere of his memories so that the senses and feelings would be recognized by the mind. Being taken from reality so quickly, Tomo expected the man to have a panicked reaction suddenly being placed in the dark pool of water where he normally bathed. The water was perfect temperature and was lit from beneath leaving the surroundings shadows.

Tomo created numerous gorgeous nude women to populate the pool with the emperor as he would suspect any man of his age and rank would crave. Though searching the man's mind, Tomo stumbled upon a fantasy. The women morphed before the man's eyes into young boys with pretty innocent faces. Tomo was disgusted at the man's bearded grin as he ran his hand over each boy's soft skin. He had been instructed to present the Emperor with a 'gift' of a fantasy, a demo of Tomo's powers, but this wasn't what he'd had in mind.

Searching for what he wanted, Tomo grinned watching dozens of slithering black snakes fill the water making it dark. The Emperor's greatest fear made the little boys disappear. Standing unnoticed at the side of the pool Tomo crackled; that was rather new to him. He rarely laughed. He was rarely amused. 

The torturing ended quickly and the Emperor blinked out of the illusion. Realizing that he was back to where he had been, the Emperor's disbelief turned to anger and vengeance, "Have him killed!" 

"Emperor, it was only an illusion." Nakago reminded him. "Think of it as a _weapon_." The point took a moment to sink in, but it brought back that nasty grin to the man's face. 

"Let him stay here at the palace with you, Nakago." that ended the meeting and both Seishi bowed leaving.

Tomo was still new at pulling others into illusions. It had been one afternoon outside in the sunny field that Erato had been running around using up her energy. She had collapsed in the tall grass and drifted off. Tomo, seated at his tree decided to try something new and focused his chi into her mind. He brought her into the _shin_ and there he was inside her head reading her memories like books. There had been a lot of strong feelings towards him; she was very attached. So for that one time, for her own pleasure, he placed just the two of them there in the tall grass. 

He laid there resting on his elbows next to her in the illusion, looking down and watching her when she opened her eyes to see a purple sky from the setting sun behind them. It was cool, but they were warm close together. She liked him without his make-up, so he was as she wanted him. Their eyes locked and threw away the key as he leaned down slowly to kiss her passionately. Her hands ran over his bare chest and up around his neck where she pulled him closer. 

Tomo watched the two of them in the _shin_ and let her enjoy her time there. It hadn't meant anything to him, it had been for her as a sister, since at the time they were still sibling-close. He'd take her out of the illusion, though she was still sleeping when he did. This brought him over to where she lay, "Illini," she seemed startled to be woken. It would convince her that it had just been a dream to look up and see the sun shining behind Tomo in his make-up. 

"Don't sleep under the sun, you'll redden your skin." She nodded and stood with him remaining silent. She never spoke of it, but Tomo knew that she had enjoyed her 'dream' and it would stay with her. He was just pleased to know he could do such a trick. 

***

Walking down a long hallway at Nakago's side, the sound of arguing told Tomo their destination. In the rather large bedroom that Erato had brought her things to, she'd begun to unpack. A tall woman with red hair pulled up and to the side of her head in a loop stood with her hands on her hips stood facing Erato. She seemed to believe she was in charge of the situation in which she was ordering Erato to stop unpacking. Erato, now rather stubborn refused. 

Nakago only had to appear in the doorway to break up the fight. "Soi," he addressed the new woman. "This is Erato, my fiancée."

"I told you." Erato stated crossing her arms with satisfaction. 

"Fine," Soi dropped her stand, and made her face appear angry that she hadn't won, but Tomo read through that; she was struck down by the truth. "I guess I'll move _my _things then." Erato seemed slightly surprised, but Nakago didn't seem at all effected. Soi gathered some clothes from a chest of drawers and as she began to leave Nakago saw Tomo standing near the door,

"And this is the new Seishi I found, Tomo," Soi passed quickly, but made sure to make eye contact with Tomo on her way out. It was a fine line between her still angry at Erato and an immediate dislike to Tomo.

***

Nakago would present Tomo with his own room only a few doors down from his and Erato's. The furniture was nicer than Tomo had ever had before, everything was furnished and sleek. There were double doors leading out to the palace's courtyard that was sunny at the time. The accommodations were nice, but nothing to become comfortable in, "The time must be drawing near if the Seishi are coming together," Nakago said from the doorway of the room. Tomo looked to him. "I've known Soi since she was young, recently we captured Ashitare, and now you."

"Drawing nearer to the calling of the Seiryuu?" Tomo had been refreshed with the legend and now understood his place within it.

"Hai," Nakago nodded. "Though all we can do is search blindly; the others will come to us." Hearing Nakago say 'us' had Tomo in a bit of a trance. Just being alone with the beautiful man had him a bit shook up. Comfort around Nakago would come slowly as he would soon take Tomo as if he was his co-pilot. 

***

Soi was awake to see them leave the next morning, but Erato didn't show her face. On their horses, Nakago and Tomo would ride far out to where they knew not, but they'd pass through several towns where the country's population gathered. In between towns was when the two spoke, "Who was it that gave you the name, Tomo?" Nakago asked and reminded him, "It is your constellation."

Tomo reached far back into his memory to bring back that blue haired boy's face, "I never knew his name." he spoke honestly. "Just a boy who was there at all the right times."

"The Seiryuu spirit," Nakago denounced. "Guiding each of us."

"He watched over me, helped me." Tomo spoke slowly and now paused realizing that it all made sense. "Saved me from myself." Nakago seemed to understand, though his tone didn't shift to indicate any empathy,

"It was because you were born to protect the no Miko, that of course he didn't want you to kill yourself." It hurt hearing Nakago say aloud what Tomo had been feeling. Hiding his wince from the impact of the words, Tomo continued,

"I never saw him after he gave me the _shin_." 

"It didn't have to reappear because you learned who you were and trained yourself." Nakago informed him. "We each got part of the spirit to guide us, each in a different form. Mine was simply hatred and vengeance, I was Soi's, Ashitare can not say, and yours was in a male form. All to keep us going." 

"You were Soi's." Tomo didn't question, just stated.

"Soi," Nakago let the name sit on his tongue for a moment. "I had found her in need of rescuing as a teenager, I hadn't known till afterwards that she was a Seishi. I took care of her. She knows intercourse techniques to enhance one's chi that I use; I have no feelings for her otherwise." Valuable information, Tomo grinned a bit.

Discussing the girls, Tomo felt the need to question about Erato. He didn't want to seem as if he was prying, but the 'brother' of him was still there and he had to know, "How do you feel towards Erato?"

"I am in love with her." Nakago stated not at all phazed by the question. "Destiny found her for me. She's just like me." he restated what he meant, "There aren't many blonde hair girls out on the streets." this suddenly angered him. "We're practically extinct."

"It's like being on another planet and finding another human." Tomo summed up Nakago's emotions.

"Hai," Nakago nodded. "And even as we speak, she hold the new evolution of my people." _Oh great,_ Tomo thought knowing that Nakago was serious about all this. There was this urge to tell him not to hurt her, but then there were still the desires for Nakago. Tomo never imagined himself stuck in another love triangle such as this. If he were to get his way, she'd have to be hurt and vise versa. Though he wasn't completely sure if she felt so strongly for Nakago as he was growing to. Tomo knew she would, but only to get back at him. Especially if she had all ready given herself to Nakago. 

Interrupting his thoughts was a boy who he suddenly noticed had been walking beside his horse since they entered the small village. This boy with a cloth wrapped around his head seemed to be pretty close to his horse. A little too close.

Noticing Tomo looking down at him, the boy gasped seeing the painted face and tripped from the surprise. Quickly climbing to his feet, his hand was in a tight fist, clutching something valuable, when he called out, "Koutoku, run!" Nakago had been watching the boy next to Tomo's horse, but a moment before he had tripped, Nakago noticed a second one next to his. The second, and identical boy had been about to jet off when Nakago stopped his horse, and grabbed him.

He held the boy up by his tiny wrist, "There's two of them."

"And five of me." Tomo duplicated himself to surround the boy trying to escape. Falling backwards to the ground the boy was absolutely terrified seeing the counterfeits lour over him. So much so that when the real Tomo came up behind him, he was frozen.

"Didn't your parents teach you better?" Nakago snatched the coins from the boy's clutched fist. Having dismounted, the two men cornered the boys. 

"Don't talk ill of our parents." the slightly smaller one piped up, though he was fearful of Nakago, it showed in his eyes.

"I wasn't talking ill of your parents," Nakago was face to face with the teenager, "I was talking ill about you."

"Shunkaku, don't." the larger one place his hands on his brother's shoulders as to calm him, and to keep him from attacking the man, which would have been a deadly mistake.

"Hmm," Nakago thought. "What to do with two little thieves..." Taking out a dagger from his belt, and catching Shunkaku's arm, he snitched, "There are places where when a thief is caught, they punish him by cutting off his hand." 

Hearing this, the boy panicked and began to squirm frantically to try to escape the deadly clutch, but it was no use. Holding the dagger to the boy's wrist, just about to break skin Tomo watched the specticale and saw Nakago get distracted. Using the dagger, he instead moved the boy's shirt aside revealing his left shoulder that had been exposed from the thin torn cloth that made-up the poor boys' shirt, shifting with the boy. Inked on his shoulder was a tattoo that Nakago brought to Tomo's attention.

"You got lucky, kid." Tomo said as Nakago released him aware as to what was going on.

"If we're lucky," Nakago went for the older twin who was just confused as to what was happening. In the same spot, but instead inked to the right shoulder there was another tattoo. Nakago titled them, "Suboshi and Amiboshi." he put away his dagger to offer, "Will you come with us?"

"No!" Amiboshi held his brother close.

"You are both Seiryuu Seishi," Nakago was the one to tell them about themselves. "Come with us, we will take you to the palace."

"You just tried to kill us." 

"You just tried to steal from us," Nakago pointed out. "I guess we'll just have to trust each other." Nothing about Nakago at that moment would have made anyone trust him. 

"We'll give you food, shelter, and clothing." Tomo saw the need to sweeten the offer. He'd reassure them that they were in no harm. Tomo knew that Nakago would force them to come with if they didn't go voluntarily.

"The palace?" the twins were looking into each other's eyes in their own silent discussion. Finally Amiboshi, being the older of the two, became the spokesperson, "Under one condition," Suboshi nodded. "That we stay together."


	6. Running Through the Wind

The twin Seishi were blown away by the palace and would enjoy their stay. Soi found them most interesting and would be the kindest to them. Nakago would find time to explain everything to them and to teach them about their chis', which they only knew so much about. They adapted their Seishi names quickly just as everyone else had. 

Tomo sat under the mid-day sun feeling the need to practice with his chi. Having used the _shin_ for his own personal fantasies illusions so many times, and the few for others, he'd really never use it as a weapon nor particularly desired to. It didn't make any sense as to why he'd need to fight with it. Nakago was the one who suggested that he practice as to be perfect when the time came. What Tomo questioned most of all was who would they have to fight? 

Holding his hand out with the _shin_ in his palm, he gently closed his eyes preparing to concentrate his chi into it, "Don't you dare suck me into there." The voice came from right in front of him. He discovered Soi when he opened his eyes. 

"I wasn't planning on it," he sneered annoyed with her sudden arrival. "I wouldn't want to create a fantasy for you."

"Fantasy?" he'd been facing the courtyard and she leaned on the railing next to where he sat. "So, since you don't _get any_ in the real world, you get it in that clam?" she seemed proud of herself for that one.

"Sure beats sleeping with a man who doesn't love you." he got her back hard. A glare was exchanged for the hit and she shifted herself to get to the reason she had came,

"Your sister-"

"She is _not_ my sister."

"Then what is she?"

"Not much." the both cracked a rather cruel grin.

"I don't like you any better than her." Tomo wasn't surprised.  
"If you're trying to hurt me," he said. "Do something that'll leave a mark."

"I see how you look at Nakago-sama." she was jealous. "Not that you stand a chance if you are..."

"I know what's happened to him," Tomo had found it in the Emperor's memories. A small rare blonde boy trapped in a man's fantasy like a cage. 

"Not that it matters, because _she_ fills the position." Soi's arms were crossed tightly. "I approach you with a proposal-"

"You two speak?" From behind, Nakago had come through Tomo's room to find them.

"Of nothing," Tomo wasn't going to put up an act like Soi was.

"He and I need to better our relations, as you say." she was smiling like a doll; lips painted into a curve.

"Then speak to the twins," Nakago wanted her off. "Tomo and I have things to discuss." Tomo would have grinned at Soi's dismay, but didn't want Nakago to see the strong rivalry. Once Soi had walked out of earshot, Nakago informed Tomo that he didn't plan for Tomo and himself to always be out and searching for Seishi, he'd find different strategies. One being that he'd called forth all of Kotou's finest fighters to be searched for symbols. "They'll arrive early tomorrow and will be brought to the courtyard." Tomo nodded knowing that he'd be the one to inspect them.

Nakago left the way he had came and Tomo turned outward to the courtyard spotting Erato sitting near a small pond. His _shin_ was still in his palm, and he wanted to know what she'd been thinking lately. Though he resigned from that idea. Putting his _shin_ away, he would pay her a visit in person. 

Erato wore fine robes of beautiful shades of blue, her hair clean and put up high on her head in two rolls. Seeing him approach she looked away, "What do _you_ want?"

"What's wrong?" he'd play the part of the calm one making her seem more hostile..

"Nothings _wrong_." she looked down at the squares of colored paper she'd been folding into flowers.

"Then why are you acting this way?" he kneeled down next her.

"What _way_?" she was playing stupid and being very imprudent about it. 

"Stop being a brat for all of a day!" She squeaked from the impact of the insult. 

"I'm not-"

"You are." he didn't spare her now that his tone had changed. "I know you're angry at me, but get over it."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you?" he didn't trust her immediate response. "You have no motives."

"Please leave me now." she turned completely away from him.

He couldn't pry anymore because all he had done so far now drove her away. Leaving her paper, she hurried away trying to run in her wooden sandals that wouldn't take her very fast. He went after her not wanting to be left like that. "Where are you going?" he was feet behind her, but she kept her pace.

Not replying, she was headed out the front of the palace. "Erato-" he tried to slow her down aware that she wasn't thinking; she didn't know where she was going nor did she care. Passing the guards, a whole city lay in front of them and Tomo knew she'd get lost out there alone so nothing kept him from continuing the chase. 

Though a crowd she raced ignoring his calls until she could no longer. She stopped there in the middle of the road, spun around and yelled, "Leave me _alone!"_

"Erato!" Tomo lunged out and knocked her backward falling on top of her. She hadn't seen the large wagon coming, the one that her upset self had blocked out. He lay on top of her holding himself up on kneels and hands knowing that any other landing would have harshly injured her frail body.

Her eyes were wide in disbelief staring up at him realizing what had happened. "You saved me..." she felt obligated to state. Why had he saved her? Had he done it for her...or Nakago? Though why would he do it for Nakago if she'd still be his?

He stood realizing how hard he'd have to work to get the stains out of his red clothing. Wiping himself off, he saw a smudge of white on her right cheek now aware that his face was smeared. "Lets just hope I saved that child," that was why he'd saved her, and that was for Nakago, he temporarily convinced himself. 

Now he was the one to hurry away, but she couldn't catch up, so she didn't even try. 

***

He knew that he'd acted too quickly to have any other reason to have saved her. He just cared about her. He care for her because he could feel. Unlike most men Tomo felt his emotions. He realized that he did before and still could. He hated it, but had come to realize that he couldn't change it. As a result, Tomo just didn't want to be around others. He liked being alone.

That night he only left his room once and on returning there was one of those paper roses on his bed.

The next morning, there was a group of men in the courtyard. Tomo came out in his normal attire and ignored their looks and snickers. He'd be testing and examining them in search for another Seishi. Each was the best of their village or class and before displaying their abilities, they gave their information. 

Tomo sat watching the young men spar and prance in their own battles. It was impressive, but nothing out of the ordinary. He knew the men thought they were competing for a rank or position, so they perfected every move they knew. 

"I come from Karauchi." the fighter's hair was dark, but it had a shine of gold in it oddly making him stand out from the others. Tomo raised an eyebrow immediately interested.

"Proceed." he waved his hand from his chair where he sat crossing his legs and his arms rather bored from the continuous show presented in front of him. This fighter knew all of the moves Tomo had been taught so long ago. Finishing his presentation, the fighter bowed in respect and Tomo was cut off before he could even ask his name,

"Emin!" Erato emerged from the side of the courtyard running to the fighter. She must have been watching and recognized the fighter.

"Erato?" there was disbelief in his voice. The two embraced displaying their relation, "I thought you were dead!"

"No, I ran away," She spoke in his shoulder, and now moved back to view the fighter's face. Tomo walked up to the reunion with his arms still crossed. "With Ruo Chuin." Erato told her brother. Tomo shuttered at the name. Oh, how he hated it now. 

"Chuin?" Emin squinted trying to see Chuin through Tomo's make-up. He nodded now piecing together a puzzle in his mind, "Rumor had it that the two of you had eloped. The deal went through and that was how father could afford to put me into training."

"You were trained by Master Urine?" speaking the name brought back a wif of memories. 

"I was." Emin nodded. "Highest ranked in my class; he said there hadn't ever been a fighter like me since..." Tomo waited for him to finish his thought. "Zane." Now he had to put effort into keeping himself standing. News of his friend alerted him.

"Zane, he was my best friend," Tomo told Emin.

"He never spoke of you." Tomo wasn't surprised. "Though once you left, I heard he strove to be a better fighter than everyone else." Sounded like Zane. 

"Oh, but brother you can stay here now!" Erato changed the subject. "At the palace with us where we can continue our lives together." Emin smiled down at his little sister as he always had. Tomo watched on until Emin turned to him and bowed to display his gratitude, "You've taken good care of my sister, I thank you." Tomo nodded just once and left the two to return to the other fighters.

***

There hadn't been a Seishi among the bunch of fighters and Tomo had to report it to Nakago. "Damn," Nakago sat back in thought. 

"We need to be expecting the Miko and allow the seventh Seishi to come to us." Tomo tried to turn the perspective of the situation. Nakago nodded in agreement. 

"True," Soi appeared in the doorway.

"Who is this new comer?" she spoke to Tomo as if it was his error that he had to cover for.

"Emin, he's Erato's brother," Tomo casually informed her. "She invited him to stay." Soi probably figured it would anger Nakago, but instead he didn't even look up.

"Whatever keeps her happy," Nakago shook it off though Soi frowned, he would never say anything like that about her. "I guess we'll have to begin the search for the Seiryuu no Miko tomorrow-"

"Come back here, Aniki!" two young boys laughed as they raced past the door and down the hall. Soi watched them and was surprised when Nakago walked out after them. Nakago was all ready in a foul mood, but chose to deal with the two youngest Seishi, leaving Soi and Tomo alone.

"You confuse me, Tomo." Soi spoke to him. She must have heard about the incident outside the palace walls. 

"I never strove to be understood." he stood strait up

"Make-up shows the uncertainty of ones self-image."

"Let's not share others secrets." he decided now wouldn't be such a bad time to ask, "Why are you speaking to me?" It was obvious that they didn't particularly get along, so why was it that she always seemed to talk to him when she was bored? 

"Is it because I am a woman, you ask this?" she seemed to look at it from a different angle. "That I should be friends with Erato instead." she shook her head while she spoke disgusted, "Nakago doesn't see me as an equal, as he does you.". she glared saying this, but returned to the topic of Erato."I know you hate her," Soi took an odd position. "She's stealing what we both _crave._" 

"What I 'crave' is none of your concern."

"Yes, but Nakago-sama is slipping out of your fingers." she went to play with the long white feathers of Tomo's headdress, but they moved out of her reach. Whatever she was up to, he wasn't going to tolerate it. 

"If it wasn't her it would be you." he reminded her

"If it wasn't her it would be you," she repeated.

"What are you talking about?" she'd achieved his confusion.

"I see how he looks at you."

"I don't, you lie." Tomo wouldn't be fooled. 

"You're just bitter because you hate women." she accused.

"I never said I hated anyone."

"Come on, help me." she got to her point and rather close to Tomo. "We'll rid of Erato, together." Her hands were about to rest of his chest, but he reacted. 

"Get off of me, you whore." anger filled him and the reaction caught her off guard. "I don't want any part of a slut like you, but if you do anything to Erato we might not be able to call the Seiryuu with one less Seishi." that was all he had to say to her, so he went for the door. Almost in the hall, she spoke,

"You love her don't you?" he looked back over his shoulder.

"What?"

"Saving her, protecting her," Soi was trying to mess with his head. "It's not about Nakago-sama, is it?"

"You don't understand what a _friendship _is, do you?" he shot at her. "You wouldn't since you've never had one." That was enough to shut Soi up. He took a step forward, but looked back once more, "Don't touch her."


End file.
